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The
Memorial We had the memorial service for Annie here at our ranch. We didn't want the impersonal atmosphere of a funeral home. Annie loved it out here and according to her friends constantly talked about home and how much she enjoyed the land and the space for her animals. So many people, almost 200 in attendance with all ages and backgrounds represented. One after another came forward to share their memories of Annie; how she had touched their lives, how special she was to them. I was stunned. She was so quiet, so introverted and yet at only 24 years of age she had affected so many people in such a positive way. They all saw her special nature. I always was in awe of my child, always incredulous that I produced and raised such an awesome person. When she first died I was afraid that no one would realize, no one would understand how wonderful she was. Today I found out that I needn't have worried. So many people did see her, did see the amazing soul that lived in my daughter. My son (he's a C&W performer) blew my socks off with a musical tribute to his sister. God, it was such a beautiful service and I will always cherish the memories of today. This is only the 2nd funeral I've ever attended, some of the older folks who are at the age to have the unfortunate experience of having attended many funerals of friends & relatives came up to me and told me that they have never been at a funeral where so many people came forward to share such beautiful memories. Annie had 4 boyfriends before James, they all came and talked to me about how Annie changed their lives. It was nice to look over and see these men grouped together quietly talking amongst themselves about how Annie had affected their lives, discovering that they all felt that somehow, one day, they would get back together with her. I told them that Annie still cared about all of them and because she did therefore I still do - they were welcome at anytime in my home, to just come and sit and feel closer to Annie if they wanted. After the bulk of the crowd had left and just the family and closest of friends remained we had an impromptu karaoke session - I even got up and sang! My 6 year old stood on a chair and sang Raindrops on Roses with me then sang "A boy named Sue" with her brother while wiggling her hips. We laughed, we shared funny stories of Annie, we cried at how much we are all going to miss her, and then we laughed again at the image of Annie watching all of this with exasperation. It was truly a celebration of her life and I found that while I cried a lot I was also very happy. But at the end of the day - my daughter is dead and I feel so much pain inside. I would sell my soul to have the chance to just hold her one more time. |